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Lajja has got to have to longest and best emotionally-biting monologue in pseudo parallel-would-be-commercial film in the history of Indian cinema. Pseudo parallel because subtlety isn’t exactly the film’s strongest point; it’s got some over the top drama, comedic moments, big stars, musical numbers [1], chopping of the limbs, and a super evil baddie that gets a la chancla [1] payback. Plus, a big BIG social message.

Are you kidding me? I love it. This is my second time watching, and I moaned, denounced, clapped, sang, shouted at the screen, called people names, and cheered.

I was so into Manisha Koirala’s ‘shame on you‘ monologue, I tried to make an image sequence of it. It’s impossible. It’s so long, but here’s part of it. Considering, the not so recent events in Delhi and Mumbai, Lajja is more relevant now than ever. It freaking needs a re-release, and more freaking women need to get off their bums and watch it.

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Ok, I admit I’ve been getting a bit crazed over Madhuri and Juhi over the past couple of days, and I was reading a double interview they both did for the promotion of Gulaab Gang, with the whole talk on female-centric films et all. I just thought: Joan Crawford.

We need a Joan Crawford revival, yo!

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Since Madhuri wouldn’t mind doing a musical, I propose a re-imagining of Torch Song for her. Coz, duh! Just switch the Broadway musical star to Bollywood, and you got yourself a Madhuri vehicle right there. You only need to avoid the blackface scene (lol!), develop better the relationship with Michael Wilding’s character, and add a demanding choreography a la boastful excess Bollywood style. I’ll need to re-watch it to figure out the whats and hows.

How about Autumn Leaves and Queen Bee as alternative?

Or a re-imagining of What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? with Juhi as Baby Jane! LOL! I LOVE IT! Now that I’ve seen her doing the evil smirk politician, I wanna see her in a Bette Davis grotesque role. That’ll really stretch her acting. I dunno how the rat scene will fly in India, though.

People were commenting that her eyes sparkle… and they kinda do! And she’s got the cutest dorkiest smile/laugh ever. I dunno if I’m ever going to be able to see her outside her Ama-chan role.

But how can she be resisted?

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The mindmeister movie journey has sprung several arms and legs, probably a few dozen fangs and a few couple of eyes. Since the beginning of the year [1], I’ve watched some 56 Indian films.

New additions? Farah Khan has her own hub, and Mira Nair has shown up there, as did M.F. Husain. Lootera sprung Ranveer Singh and Sonakshi Sinha, and Ranveer sprung Anushka Sharma and Parineeti Chopra. Luck by Chance sprung Farhan Akhtar and Madhur Bhandarkar finally got his hub. Major new film additions to Kamal Hassan, Sridevi (GOSH, Sadma/Moondram Pirai), and Shabana Azmi.

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Click on the image for the large version.

I haven’t done a fake Criterion fanart in a long time — possibly in over 4 years [1] — but after seeing M.F. Husain’s films, I couldn’t resist. Besides Madhuri Dixit- DUDE! Tabu as Meenaxi. I can’t possibly resist.

Fake Criterion Collection: M. F. Husain - Gaja Gamini Fake Criterion Collection: M. F. Husain - Meenaxi

I do believe that Tabu acted miles around the material that Madhuri Dixit got, and that M.F. Husain should’ve used a lot more of Madhuri’s dancing skills and charisma to get his muse concept across. Especially considering how she was his muse and all.

Full set on Flickr and MUBI.

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